selling my art on redbubble website

some new art

some old favorite art

and maybe some new ways of looking at the art I had created

Take a look at some of the products.

://www.redbubble.com/people/reensarai/shop

 

As we all prepare to re enter the workplace

or re enter a new workplace

or recreate our work from home

May you find some pieces of inspiring love to add to the beauty of the life you wish to create this 2020

what a heavy uncertain time.

i am safe.hope you are too.

 

take a look around and share what you like with your friends.

all artwork created with the intention of love..

 love on limited time off

 

 

 

reblog:Looking for Free Lancing !! — RPrakashRao

Hello Again, Yes As the title speaks itself, I am seriously looking for a free lancing project, and I want to know more regarding the same, I have done some free lancing content writing thing few years ago,and I want to do it again, It has nothing to do with lockdown, i want to make […]

via Looking for Free Lancing !! — RPrakashRao

reblog:Looking for Free Lancing !! — RPrakashRao

Hello Again, Yes As the title speaks itself, I am seriously looking for a free lancing project, and I want to know more regarding the same, I have done some free lancing content writing thing few years ago,and I want to do it again, It has nothing to do with lockdown, i want to make […]

via Looking for Free Lancing !! — RPrakashRao

reblog:#GeorgeFloyd protests in Canada, England, Japan & Germany TODAY! Incredible show of international solidarity. #BLACK_LIVES_MATTERS — Interracial Marriage

The cry of black blood has been heard around the world and the vibration is felt among the nations of the world. This movement must be focused toward the enrichment of closing the black and white wealth gap in the America’s and through this move, the nations of the world may have hope in making […]

via #GeorgeFloyd protests in Canada, England, Japan & Germany TODAY! Incredible show of international solidarity. #BLACK_LIVES_MATTERS — Interracial Marriage

reblog:#GeorgeFloyd protests in Canada, England, Japan & Germany TODAY! Incredible show of international solidarity. #BLACK_LIVES_MATTERS — Interracial Marriage

The cry of black blood has been heard around the world and the vibration is felt among the nations of the world. This movement must be focused toward the enrichment of closing the black and white wealth gap in the America’s and through this move, the nations of the world may have hope in making […]

via #GeorgeFloyd protests in Canada, England, Japan & Germany TODAY! Incredible show of international solidarity. #BLACK_LIVES_MATTERS — Interracial Marriage

little gallery from 14 day dive to intro to portraiture

https://www.portrait.gov.au/classes/the-amazing-face/intro  

really enjoyed this into to portraiture course from April to May

some of my favorite lessons were:

https://www.portrait.gov.au/classes/the-amazing-face/penny-drop-Penny drop

https://www.portrait.gov.au/classes/the-amazing-face/sage-advice Sage advice

https://www.portrait.gov.au/classes/the-amazing-face/back-in-brack- back in the brack

https://www.portrait.gov.au/classes/the-amazing-face/spirit-level  spirit level

 

if you love photography there are some nice lessons too

if you love creating you may enjoy this free course too.

 

 

 

 

reblog:Are you missing material things… in the lockdown ?? — Thoughts of Sho

Have we realised it yet ? That nobody is missing the materials things; we all miss the company of othes, great conversations, a hug, a smile… that’s what life is all about… Do you agree to this ?? Today, I saw this as the status in a social media account of a colleague; I realised […]

via Are you missing material things… in the lockdown ?? — Thoughts of Sho

reblog:Movies to watch while quarantined – — Sophrosyne

If you like to be on the edge, here are few movies which can give you thrilling feel of the Corona season. World War Z, Book of Eli, The Road, I am Legend, Bird Box, Children of Men, Snowpiercer, 28 days later, 12 monkeys, Contagion, Warm bodies, escape from New York, Resident evil franchise, Take […]

via Movies to watch while quarantined – — Sophrosyne

reblog:Boost your immunity- — Sophrosyne

Good morning everyone It has been while since I blogged. I’ve been busy from past few months and it doesn’t look like it’s going to get easier anytime soon. I’m going to quickly write down a short list of foods to include in your diet to boost your immunity to fight diseases (especially COVID-19) out […]

via Boost your immunity- — Sophrosyne

reblog:whir of days — House of Heart

Comes the days when we reach back into seas of pinpoint diamonds where like globes of fire we spun through glimmering heavens yielding only to the pull of hearts. Now the dew falls from our eyes Not from the sky, the tide pulls outward and mountains lose their foothold but a new sun is rising […]

via whir of days — House of Heart

reblog:Conversation with Chandrima Sarkar: Food Blogger and Recipe Developer

Kolam Konnect

Today we’re talking with Chandrima Sarkar, the very gifted women behind the fabulous blog Not out of the box. Chandrima is a recipe developer, food stylist, and food blogger from Navi Mumbai, who has taken social media by storm with her creative, flavorful and eye-catching food photography.

1.Tell us a bit about your family, career background, and the path that led you to set up Not out of the Box?

Born and brought up in the suburb of Kolkata in a Bengali family, I studied Bengali literature and wanted to pursue Masters from Calcutta University, but I just took an impromptu decision not to continue with higher studies on the final day of university admission. As I had a keen interest in creating storytelling with high visual impact, I studied computer graphics in early 2000. The keen interest of Fine Art pushed me to pursue a career in…

View original post 785 more words

reblog:The sun will come out tomorrow… A message of hope. — Reflection of My Journey

I love it when the suns rays shine through the clouds in this manner. It sends a message of hope to my soul, that even though dark times, the sun is still shining through and that tomorrow will come and be even brighter… When I see this, a message of hope resides in my soul…

via The sun will come out tomorrow… A message of hope. — Reflection of My Journey

reblog:I need to keep reading this. How to Set Boundaries — Ron Tamir Nehr

Do you struggle with boundaries? Setting boundaries is about more than just personal and emotional space. Many people struggle with boundaries, but it isn’t as obvious as you might think. A boundary struggle can manifest as a difficulty saying no or as social anxiety. You might feel guilty about speaking your mind if it upsets someone. Because of this, you might put the needs of others before your own.

via How to Set Boundaries — Ron Tamir Nehr

Been so long,how are you all during these uncertain times?

I had the pleasure with chatting with one of you

and all we exchanged was positive golden words.

despite being in different countries

different time zones

different restrictions.

the sadness and the gratefulness is the same.

20171101_194710844

we all are grieving a loss of freedom.

and with the inner freedom,we have this opportunity

…we all are facing ourselves:

our minds

our bodies

our hangups

everything that was not grounded..20171116_165631480

we have this time to gaze at..ourselves,deeply

and have an inner dialogue20171106_111854

 

In this time along with my peers

I have been called to serve

serve family

serve health

and serve the work I am here to do

Instead,

I find myself

writing a lot

to myself,

reflecting on life,

or

creating

20180130_173849

creating as release,as a way to honor memories of loved ones who have passed away suddenly in 2020 or creating the joy I have from memories…or long to create.2019-05-17

 

one last thing before i go

please dear ones

eat good food (vitamin rich)

keep fit

enjoy sunshine

and keep your immunity up with at least 6-8 hours of good sleep.

I find myself rebooting by being with nature…

bare feet on the grass

gazing at flowers near by

looking at the branches of leaves

having a few plants in my home workspace..

and listening to the sweet songs of the birds tending to their nest.Untitled design

I am lucky that for mental health we are encouraged to visit beach or park from 6m-10am.

still keeping distance and still covering mouth and nose if people are around.

…and all I love is closed.

 

1483473989648

I decided to start selling my artwork on a few websites.

Maybe I have outgrown them..Maybe they will sooth someone at home at this time

I am grateful to be supported to share my art in this way at this time.

here are the websites so far:

https://www.redbubble.com/people/reensarai/shop

https://society6.com/reensarai

https://artofwhere.com/artists/reensarai-8

 

Please do share with your friends,and come visit the shops too..

I am still loading some of my favorite soothing paintings on the websites..

you can enjoy looking  at my art public on Instagram too..

https://www.instagram.com/southasianwomancreates/

 

some music for your entertainment.

last but not least

what have i been upto…..

https://www.portrait.gov.au/classes/the-amazing-face/intro

this free introduction to portraiture 14 lesson series…

there is art

there is photgraphy

and there are solo and connected tasks too

I am working on the last lesson.. self portrait..

will post it here in the blog when I complete…

take care everyone

 

 

reblog:Your Parents Gave You Everything. Here are Some Ways to Make Sure They Feel Loved — simple Ula

When we’re young, it’s way too easy to take pretty much everything for granted. We assume that our friends will stay our friends forever. We assume that we’ll always have those teenaged metabolisms that allow us to eat whatever we want and still stay in shape (yeah, we all miss that). We assume that the…

via Your Parents Gave You Everything. Here are Some Ways to Make Sure They Feel Loved — simple Ula

reblog:Let Us Be Those — Phoebe, MD: Medicine + Poetry

When all are in trial, When all are in denial, Let me be the one to share a smile. Let me be the one to share a dance. Let it be an advance, to be enhanced, when all are weary, let me be the one to share thinking clearly, to share being ever so cheery. […]

via Let Us Be Those — Phoebe, MD: Medicine + Poetry

reblog:How to Assert Yourself When Boundaries Get Broken — Ron Tamir Nehr

Self acceptance is the act or state of accepting oneself and understanding or recognizing one’s own abilities and limitations. Self acceptance is crucial for living a fulfilled life. Authentic, satisfying relationships with other people are impossible to build without self acceptance. Try these exercises to improve self acceptance.

via How to Assert Yourself When Boundaries Get Broken — Ron Tamir Nehr

hi all,happy holidays

Hi everyone

how has your 2019 been?

Woman typing on laptop. Workspace with green leaves, mug of coff
stockphoto: https://www.hercreativestudio.com/

I have had a heavy year

loss of elders that deeply mattered,

loss of trust in mistakes made by those in power to lead,

and a deep passion and purpose growing within me.

 

so

I have been busy focusing on the good work i can do.

Perhaps the only visible thing has been my creative expression and collaborations.

warm drinks for december.
stockphoto: katemaxstock

It has been a place to put deep emotions and let go.

before the holiday cooking marathon begins…

I thought i would type a blog post.

also

This year I’m doing an online retreat. Think movement, art, energy work and mini workshops all from home. The retreat has had over 65,000 women join from all over the world. Want to do it with me?

it’s free.

it’s online

and the replay will last until new years.

https://womanunleashed.com/wu11/?fbclid=IwAR3Xs9CgAAGHt500dhB35qwuM6EZ81Z7WikNoM0THcTuJiZ09g52LbkY1Gs

 

although this will be my last year.

through 2019 i have discovered things that i have outgrown.

Hope you all are doing well.

wishing you a good completion of 2019 as we embark on the journey of 2020.

in case you are unable to join the womens’ retreat,

yet you want to follow along and see what i have created within women unleashed retreats..you can…

check out my pubic Instagram just for this month..

https://www.instagram.com/southasianwomancreates/

 

reblog:Living or Dreaming – Poem — Writing My Heart Out

As the Sun rises brightburning up the darknessI step out of my roomwaking up from a nightmare I walk on the road barefootsometimes run or drive a vehiclewhere everything & everyone aroundseems like a daydream A dream which I’m livingsince I came to existenceor is my existence also an illusionfrom my dream? I spend my…

via Living or Dreaming – Poem — Writing My Heart Out

reblog: M & M Cookies — In Dianes Kitchen

I love using the red and green M & M’s for a festive cookie for Christmas. Use the multi-colored M & M’s to make these cookies any time of the year. These cookies are always a big hit because who doesn’t love M & M’s? To see the step by step directions with pictures and […]

via M & M Cookies — In Dianes Kitchen

reblog:Your Parents Gave You Everything. Here are Some Ways to Make Sure They Feel Loved — simple Ula

When we’re young, it’s way too easy to take pretty much everything for granted. We assume that our friends will stay our friends forever. We assume that we’ll always have those teenaged metabolisms that allow us to eat whatever we want and still stay in shape (yeah, we all miss that). We assume that the…

via Your Parents Gave You Everything. Here are Some Ways to Make Sure They Feel Loved — simple Ula

woohoo it is winter holidays… reblog a favorite blog post of a creative friend of mine…

https://thechautauquanewspaper.blogspot.com/2019/12/december-20-2019-chautauqua.html?fbclid=IwAR1eMjNAjsSRlrS8rYoE6TRLrU4PVicXZbc9id6QiqRm1Ty-81ejq4sifyw

after 6 months.

dear community,

what keeps you consistent in blogging?

I was  reading a few of yours..

you all are so talented in your expression.

do you have a schedule?

is it part of self care?

 

in case you do have posts that address these two questions feel free to link them in the comments.

and also

congratulations to each of you!

sending you all warm joy as the sun sets where i am!

 

reblog:14 on 14 — On a mission

Happy 14th aka Happy Children’s Day for India. Here is my 14: Support Children in growing their talent by giving them directional help. Renew their enthusiasm. When their young put them in sports. Their body is elastic so make them do all kind of exercise. Listen to them what they are saying. Travel with them. […]

via 14 on 14 — On a mission

reblog:Where Are The Indian/SA/BIPOC ‘Safe’ Asana Teachers? — The Curvy Yogi

Gosh! Believe me when I say this: I am not following Jenni Rawlings or her blog. But, this link to her latest blog post 7 Prominent Yogis Weigh in on Yoga Injuries and What to Do About Them was shared on a group I am a part of with the comment that the member found […]

via Where Are The Indian/SA/BIPOC ‘Safe’ Asana Teachers? — The Curvy Yogi

reblog:Inclusion Matters – Even in a Yoga Studio! — The Curvy Yogi

I had an interesting discussion with some of my mentees yesterday. A question was raised about the religious implications of the “Om” mantra. Some of the teachers had noticed that in select yoga studio locations, their practitioners were not participating in the standard end-of-class chanting. It was unquestioningly assumed that the Om mantra might not be congruent […]

via Inclusion Matters – Even in a Yoga Studio! — The Curvy Yogi

reblog:Are You a Good Friend to Yourself? — Dr. Eric Perry, PhD

Written by Dr. Perry, PhD Image Credit: Pixabay “A friend is a gift you give yourself.” ~Robert Louis Stevenson What kind of friend are you? Are you attentive, kind and compassionate or, are you neglectful, uncaring and critical? Scrolling through quotes on the internet, I was reminded of the immense value we place on friendship. […]

via Are You a Good Friend to Yourself? — Dr. Eric Perry, PhD

reblog:Stir-Fry Pork and Vegetables — A Jeanne in the Kitchen

We all have heard of and most likely eaten many stir-fried meals. We also all know, a stir-fry dish is an Asian way of cooking that was created in China, many centuries ago, and then traveled to other parts of Asia, and eventually to many other parts of the world. Stir-frying is a method of […]

via Stir-Fry Pork and Vegetables — A Jeanne in the Kitchen

wow it has been a long time.

hi community,

How are you?

how has your 2019 been?

mine

lately it was pretty heavy.pretty heavy since august.

In my profession i witnessed a few injustices in end of life care.

and have been being a shoulder  since.someone close to me lost their mom by an injustice by the staff who were not aware while inserting breathing tube.

and this elderly mom passed away so suddenly.

and this close one of mine.O great heart I wonder what is next.

I attended the open casket funeral.

and the family(adult childen) will be mourning for 100 days.

and during those 100 days.

I have been creating art,while witnessing them in their loss.

 

I have missed being here and typing in my words and expression.

I am sorry all of you.I was in a good mood to express.just create.

 

2019 has been a few creative collaborations

the most recent is

abstract painting.

following the late great women painters fo abstract painting

trying out new techniques

and amazed after.

not just by what I created with my 2 hands pouring cans of acrylic paint.

More of

wow

before the internet,

before blogging,

these creatives just traveled

and would create beautiful paintings remembering nature.. and natures beauty.

I am talking about helen frankenthaler…

her travels to nova scotia

and various places in masechusetts.

the colors, the layers,and after creating to look at pictures of the nature she was inspired by

mind blowing.

my IT engineer friend and I have been buddy painting a few artist great work.

Helen frankenthaler,

Lee Krasner,

Alma thomas,

and finally Hedda Sterne.

each so unique!!

they all are long gone from  earth,

yet their art work and life stories remain,

their art still inspires.

At a time art by women was not taken seriously

these rebels were creating abstracts.

 

Why did i start this creative collaboration?

Well my dear friend is taking an art class,

and after all the professional training,art never had a place.

Now she is making space for it.

yet there is a sadness…”why do I feel like I am wasting my time?”

she asks me?

I ask “what do you mean?”

“well all in class they are master artist… and i create art like a 2 or 3 year old. my art looks so bad..”

My heart just cracked wide open….”Dear friend,I understand how you feel.This art journey is you,your hands and the art materials…I wish i was sitting in this class with you..tell you what..how about we buddy paint a few of the assignments? you are in no way alone!”

so we started.

we painted a few pieces of these artist together at the same time…but in different places.

I would take a picture and send her the painting. and she would do the same.

you can check out my paintings on instagram

I tried copying…yet my hands create totally different.

this was the hardest task of the class..abstract.

now my friend…she loves abstract…

after reading a little about the lives of the lady artist.

who faced the same emotions,frustration,challenges…She connected.

“Hey we are painting some angels and saints ,huh?”

 

you know what,

i gained a lot from this collaboration…

I finally stepped into my role as a creator…

and signed my painting…

inspired by lee krasners story…

creating after the loss of a close one.

recently an uncle of mine passed away from cancer,i am unable to go to the funeral in another country.

yet painting put a place for grief

it moved the emotion through

it is so interesting…Lee krasner.. painting after her husbands sudden death…

signing her paintings playfullly

to find comfort in her creations.

i am talking about the painting sun woman.

wow.

 

 

I don’t know..just thought I woudl type in here after a long time.

Maybe I will return and post some of the paintings here for you all.

reblog friday has been on a hiatus.

hope to revive it again.

I will reblog a few that I see……

and come bakc to edit these typed words.

 

sending you all love for the closure of 2019.

 

 

 

things I do to stay rooted in who i am growing to be.

It happens sometimes life shakes us up.

We forget what our passion is,

we forget why did we start this good habit in the first place.

we may even absorb teaching that we don’t believe in.

It happened to me 18th of may.

alpine clouds daylight grass
Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

I felt shook up.

i think I blogged just after that day.

i feel so much better now.

I was overwhlemed.

things I do to reconnect to who I am.

1)listen to music that i loved less then7 years ago.

gray ipod classic
Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

2) reconnect with friends locally and aks them what is my unique quality that you appreciate in me?

woman eating bruschetta
Photo by Adrienn on Pexels.com

3) deepen the love with the people connection I already have.

selective focus photography silver bauble hanged on brown wooden
Photo by Cameron Casey on Pexels.com

4)delete all communication apps

5) refrain from facebook/instagram/twitter for a while

those newsfeeds can sometimes be uneccessary

6) be curious about anger/sadnesss/fatigue or boring moments

animal blur curious cute
Photo by Oleksandr Pidvalnyi on Pexels.com

7)get  out in nature

8) enjoy a bright sunrise/colorful sunset

9) make a to do list based on what is a priority now

person holding white book planner
Photo by rawpixel.com on Pexels.com

10) go for a walk

Photo by Amine M’Siouri on Pexels.com

woman standing and doing pose beside lake
Photo by Đàm Tướng Quân on Pexels.com

11)review what has been going on recently,what are my dreams? what can i do now that can get me closer to my dream.

blackboard business chalkboard concept
Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

 

hope all of you are doing great.

photography of woman surrounded by sunflowers
Photo by Andre Furtado on Pexels.com

it has been a while,i have been creating for 100 day project.

hi everyone,

I typed a mini post about the 100 day project in april end,yet it never got published

oooops!

so i am here now.

There is so much that dwells within me to write, type, speak

yet somehow,I  have not been blogging for a while.happy full moon !

architecture area bay bridge
Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com
close up of smart phone
Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

it has been a busy time of the year.

Even then,

I have been creating. and sharing on instagram…I somehow stopped sharing my written expression.most popular on instagram.

So it is almost 50 days into the 100-day project.i ahve been creating consistantly daily for more than a month.Yet….

the other day while creating and sharing the art, I noticed something.

My descriptions keep getting longer.PSX_20190512_070313

Oh no, not just that.I was attempting to share about me and what I am feeling.oooops mask off mask on….laughter!

 

portrait of young woman
Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

then it hit me……

hello,Reen you have not been blogging!some of the favorite words printscripted with watercolor background.

oh my.oh my!

hope you all have been good!

I hope to catch up on some of your interesting blogs as well.

I though I would pop back in and share some of the 100 day project.some of my favorite creations

and It turns out those paintings are getting a blog of their own on medium. They just have so many tiny insights from creating consisitantly for 45 days.

have a break led signage
Photo by Alexas Fotos on Pexels.com

I will be popping back in here as inner work  has never stopped.

the magic of you sereis by Lotus Sky.

the spiritual revolution series by kiran kaur

and in between sketchbook revival

lots of people,lots of typeing,lots of communicating in person discussions,buddy watching episodes. and then the many phone call discovery uncoveries after.

 

In person discussion with the like minded who have gone through similar .

person holding white snes controller
Photo by Jens Mahnke on Pexels.com

 

within questions are coming up such as:

“how can I step more into personal leadership?

eight person huddling
Photo by rawpixel.com on Pexels.com

how can I stay more commited to my inspired action and follow through to completion of  tasks/goals intention?

How can i share my gifts and talents in the world to uplift humanity other then in my profession of healthcare?

sometimes it feels like it is just not enough.we need creative solutions everywhere.

blackboard business chalkboard concept
Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

until now it had been creating art  and sharing it.

woman pointing on sticky note on a wall
Photo by rawpixel.com on Pexels.com

and writing.. mostly for myself…and also in this blog.

antique architecture contemporary custom
Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

 

and speaking occasionaly in discussions…..yet

something is calling me forward to share the empowering inspiring words that come after the heartache and pain that comes from life…

something like a series of letters to my youger self?

white petaled flowers selective focus photography
Photo by Brett Sayles on Pexels.com

to create space for those ssssshhhhhh! discusssion.9creativity,intimacy,cultural taboo topics)

age antiquarian antique book
Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

I wonder? and what is my role in all this?

assorted color hanging umbrellas
Photo by Engin Akyurt on Pexels.com

 

do any of you feel that way?

Recently I recieved some prizes:inner movie maker award for my written expression during a meditation callenge.

that delighted me…

and also stunned me…

in healthcare…I am still unable to express these gifts.

I used to make commercials with a play video camera as a kid with my siblings,schoolmates,classmates.childhood playmates.

and then

I dropped all that during the SAT’s….

later duing non profit healthcare charities,i used to do street plays to express about health topics to teenagers.

and then I  dropped all that for final competitive exams.

and then board exams….

Hmmm!

I think something new is emeging.

I wonder.

I wonder wonder wonder when….i can combine all these gifts in one…or maybe i can start laying the foundations…hmmm?!?

 

 

 

session 17: Play Hard Love Hard

Can We Replace The Physical?
with Event Coordinator & DJ, Eric Spivak(http://www.eric-spivak.com/)
he had a harsh real way of speaking
 yet all he shared was so real
 so true and hurts
#physicallife
How often do you go to live events?
once in a while when a preformer that I resonate with is touring when I am currently
– When was the last time you went out by yourself? I go out by myself once a week to an event
– I challenge you to go to a new place and talk to someone. Then share your experience.
oooh
I try this task once a month
 so far it has been magical encounters
 after following intuitive hits..
 hurts enough to change
to uplevel
and step into our roles and showing up
as a leader for a cause we believe in
 it is worth showing up….

session 15:Play Hard Love Hard

Marketing the Authentic You
with Health & Wellness Coach, Shayna Hiller(http://www.shaynahiller.com/)
this has to be my favorite session!
 marketing maintaining you energy is an advice I really appreciated from this interview.
i guess i secretly like branding topics
 she had some valueable to share from her many years of experience fo branding adn rebranding.
 all about marketing
seflcare and self love at the same time her idea of health was interesting.
 the idea of searching and learning for yourself …..to create a service ….to share with others
 and finally creating a brand and all the hang ups  we deeply feel while  sharing our selves in  buisness on social media
#marketyou
these answers change every day
 as i keep evolving
Do you find social media inspiring or distracting?

I find social media distracting when I am looking at my professional peers/classmates/alumni/coworkers.

I find social media inspiring when I am looking at mentors and inspirational creatives

apps business cellphone cellular telephone
Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com
– Do you find your social media reflecting the authentic you?
I share my art on Instagram
creative expression of emotions on my blog.
FB purely for group participation/retreats and group training. my page is not too active.
I got bored of FB profile page a decade ago I guess,especially after joining the medical profession I find ethical concerns and deactivate from FB often to protect patient files while online.

three people using smartphones
Photo by rawpixel.com on Pexels.com

What is holding you back from putting out your content?

professional vows of privacy.
and
content being stolen????!!!???
judgment from my professional bosses and finally, all is pretty public already.
I am still learning who I am and my deeper why
as I still dive deep into what am i passionate about
and how
and the path that leads to the next excitement…..

photo of woman looking at a flower field
Photo by Matej Čerkez on Pexels.com

session 14: Play Hard Love Hard

The Power of Music and Your Voice
with Inspirational Entertainer, Justin MichaelWilliams
what I loved about his session is about all the wisdom he had share about his grandmother and him
 and the suden loss!

 all he realised that he wanted to acheive and contribute to socitey

a deeper way to Connect with your inner voice

#voicepower
– Empower that inner voice to share with the world
– Open up with music
– Are you afraid to speak your truth?

yes, with my elderly parents
and
no, I am not afraid to speak my truth with all others
as my undertone is just warm love!
warm love for humanity
after my 2 friends passed away
I know i am here to give and be love to all I interact with.
life can be so short
never know the positive impact we can smile to another.

light in the dark forest
photo: https://www.pexels.com/photo/person-holding-lantern-near-pink-flowering-plant-1904839/

– What is your favorite type of music and why?
I love music:
instrumental= to write to
music that moves me=so I can dance out and move my emotions
uplifting music, inspiring people who sing with their voice=
empowers me to move out of fear, sadness, confusion
upbeat music=
to get me in the mood as if my dream/challenge becomes awesome.
mixed playlists i love!

Breakfast and Baking-cafe music please
styled stock photography by Shay Cochrane for the SC Stockshop.(https://www.scstockshop.com/

– What issues will you use your voice for?
anything that I can say that will uplift anyone
especially for who feels scared to show up for themselves.

I am passionate to speak about issues that I have overcome
any moment that I can share my heart.

I am discerning about what topics i will take a stand for.

mostly i take a stand for love!

photo: https://atelier21co.com/

reblog:Positivity Vibes…Shine — yonniewordpresscom

Allow Positivity To Radiant Through You, Set The Tone. Let It Start You… Whether In Your Home, In The Workplace or Abroad. Let Positivity Light, Shine Bright, Vibe Right… Change The Atmosphere. Let It Start With You💜 InHisCare🙏 Yonnie💜

via Positivity Vibes…Shine — yonniewordpresscom

been missing for a while…i was deeply processing

hope you all are ok…

i a have been keeping busy as usual.

recently I commited to the 100dayproject going on online.

I create art everyday.

I do have moments that after creating so much writtingemerges.I hope to share soem here.

posted a few more pending posts.yet they are un edited

I shall be back on the weekend..

sending all of you out there love and joy!

 

session 11 : Play Hard Love Hard

Embracing the burning phase

with Holistic Lifestyle Coach, Nick Perry(https://www.rhythmhealth.com.au/)

once upon a time….

https://www.surfertoday.com/bodyboarding/nick-perry-signs-to-pride-bodyboards

I actually rememeber when nick perry was a famous surfer and surfing the world

traveling

I often wondered what happened to him?

he had so many jewelsof wisdom from his life experience to share…

about life.

trying out what you love, finding mentors and exporing and finally getting to know yourself more and more in time! =self discovery!

stock photo : https://www.pexels.com/photo/ocean-wave-1656579/

#trustlove

What are you still holding on to and afraid to let go?
routines that don’t work. those routines are like a comfort zone.
old acquaintances that I have outgrown or changed locations.

moments I am with old acquaintances and they ramble on about  “should”or they are not all there(scrolling on phone while talking with me/no eye contact)

?!? and how shall I change this

listen deeper to each loving relationship/friendship I have now.i chose to commit to   speak clearly when I observe this repeating pattern of disconnected conversation “I will reconnect with you, when you can be present and give me your best energy to co create joy with me”….

photo: https://www.pexels.com/photo/close-up-photo-of-orange-flower-62669/

 

Who are some of your mentors/teachers?
mentors who cheer me on to my authentic self tgroughthe path less talked of….innovating a new way of being…

work- Kien Vu,Dr Marie Mboumi
activism-Sonali Fiske
leadership from spirit-Kavita Leela Arora
creativity transition-Joyce van der leyle
all things feminine way in the logical science mind-Jonita D’souza,Christine Arylo,Katherine Alexander-hille.
life coach:rachelle
teachers many.

photo from pexels: https://www.pexels.com/photo/succulent-maroon-rooted-grounded-stability-1890369/

Do you trust yourself/Life?
I trust myself mostly in territories i have been through
I trust my intuition
I am learning to trust myself in sharing my radiant gifts while i create.
so I trust myself with life…still learning so I call up my mentors.

session 6:Play Hard Love Hard

Re-Defining Open Relations

with Somatic Sex Coach, Victoria Smith (https://www.victoriaredbard.com/)

natalie interviews Victoria Smith

the most interesting part of the interview was the meditiation offered(open relating)

https://www.victoriaredbard.com/open-relating

when you inquire to different parts of the body while breathing deeply

do you rememeber a desire from childhood

or a feeling from a previous heartache

or a feelng of unfufillment that you can explore and inquire about now

 

#openrelating

What does your Brain want
(my brain always idealized the best case scenario plan in all past relationships.wow-though none of that happened, heart took over, no regrets.)
= brain just has a silent space of peace as it is loopy…

– What does your Heart want
the heart is happy and expansive as it is warm and relaxed,a maiden happy to feel, express and play in that field of possibility

– What does your Groin Area want?
all lady parts are sipping to explore and revel in what is…
currently, this area is doing so much already…

what exists curiousity

in what ways can i grow and open my mind beyond all I haevbeen exposed to

– What area will you choose to honor?
I chose to honor heart to the groin…
as the brain always finds peace no matter whatever happened to the ideal plan.

I really loved this meditation!

 

session 9: Play Hard Love Hard

Creating Boundaries for Higher Performance
with High Performance Coach, Monte Cox(http://www.montecoxbody.com/)
what was so interesting about this discussion is the inquiry of boundaries
 and replacing what you do not like to do
 with ten minutes a day of what you love to do instead!
 you have a wish list!
 we all do…..
what a great idea,right?
 and how often we delay this list to achive or keep the status quo?
 sure there are things we can throw off our to do list to accomplish something that we always wanted to try…

time to get real!

I just want to go shopping and window shop in a daydream...
photo:https://hautestock.co/
#boundaries

What are some areas in your life where you feel drained?
I feel drained by my work neighbors..asking for help even though they are well skilled to handle on their own.

beverage-cafe-coffee-704217
photo from https://www.pexels.com

– What are some boundaries you can put in your life to shift that?
placed boundaries on helping out all the time to placing a post-it list of options instead of being physically available to providing help.(hint hint hint-lady mentor boss totally shared this idea to me)
I also placed boundaries to certain times when I am on out of campus project.
has been working out great in 2019.woohoo

arched-window-architecture-beach-572780
photo: https://www.pexels.com/photo/arched-window-architecture-beach-cliff-572780/

– What are some qualities that avoid you from saying “No”

qualities of loyalty to :
long term coworkers….
long time friends…

yes. I get attached by feeling loyal…

cobblestone-earth-surface-granite-1029604
photo: https://www.pexels.com/photo/photography-of-stones-1029604/

session 8: Play Hard Love Hard

Creating an “and” life rather than “or”
with Women’s Empowerment Coach, Natalia Benson=(https://www.nataliabenson.com/)
and some background music for you

#andnotorphoto from : https://atelier21co.com/?wpam_id=9

Is there anything in your life you feel torn between choosing?
I feel torn between choosing my inner wild woman and my inner child.

Both of who I have ignored while working.

I promise
photo: https://atelier21co.com

– Is there a way you can create an “and” situation instead of “or”?
yes!
while uncovering the deeper why of passion
and happens.
I feel it is entertaining new interests I keep evolving.

possibility
photo: https://atelier21co.com

– What are some typical ways you’ve dealt with break up?

each break up has been a self discovery journey

as in romantic relationships, I feel I merge so deeply into the other person’s habits/environment/routine that i almost forget myself…
so my way of dealing is
diving deep into me….
who am I?what is my calling? and what am I passionate about now?”
it is more like an inner check in too.
how have I changed and what will I carry forward..?…

abstract-art-blur-1119973
photo from pexels: https://www.pexels.com/photo/boat-out-at-sea-at-ddusk-2128161/

– Are those ways serving you?
yes
now I do that check in seasonally
because why wait to realign to who I am?what I am passionate about? and where am I going?

 

session 7: Play Hard Love Hard

Being Authentic in a Digital World
with Empowerment Coach, Dr. Morgan Oaks
a ted ex speaker
 who recently tried a bunch of diffent way to access his authentic self
including comedy classes?!?
 landing him into coaching….from
 chiropractic practice
and finally as a ted ex speaker
 i found  this session very intersting and powerfully inspiring.

#authentic

image-from-rawpixel-id-39572-jpeg
image from rawpixel

– Do your digital relationships feel authentic?
yes mostly.
I do my best to witness and also share my vulnerability when I feel it is invited.
I try my best to be open and warm.
I am still learning….

Atelier21 Co - Boss Mornings-20
photo from : https://atelier21co.com

– What are some boundaries you create to filter your online relationships?
the most important boundary I keep and maintain is kept my intimate relationships off social media. I actually get off social media, turn off my phone to really engage fully with my beloved and my close ones.
there may be more boundaries…which I am  still learning to recognize and appreciate.

Atelier21 Co - Moving In-54
image from: https://atelier21co.com

session 12: Play Hard Love Hard

powerful leaderships

Becoming a Powerful Leader Through Your Trauma

with Life and Relationship Coach,Thatja Andrade ( https://thatjaandrade.com/)

#leader

Social Squares
photo: https://www.socialsquares.com

What are some of your biggest fears?
( getting really vulnerable here)
I have big fears of dying !
more specific: while moving fast in a descending direction.

fear of driving fast downhills via car/bike/skateboard/rollerskates etc.

somehow this fear is absent on group rides/trails and roller coasters
somehow in someways i have over come this to be able to function and in some ways I still struggle with this.

Do you feel you are a leader?
I feel I am a leader on all inspirational journeys of cheering the team on to the goal or on all uphill climbs(physically and mentally)

The solo traveler
photo: https://www.rawpixel.com/

What do you need to let go of to get to the next level in your life?
I need to stop looking downwards in the past footsteps(physically and mentally)
fear of what I have overcome
in ways is holding me back
I need to let it all go and surrender with a deeper trust within.

what I learned from this

to lead:

really starts with self love!

(giving to self,

as well as being a great generous giver=

to be of service!

=we oriented…

something worth learning.

lead your tribe
California. Original image from Carol M. Highsmith’s America, Library of Congress collection. Digitally enhanced by rawpixel.

 

session 4: Play Hard Love Hard

Masculine Way To Sacred Love

with Relationship Alchemist, Stefanos Sifando

(https://stefsifandos.com/)

the interveiw with natalie and stafanos was very interesting!
forget the gender roles society says….
what is feminine?  and masculine? to you?….He challenges!…
so interesting
now for the questions natalie posed:
#masculinelove
reflecting on questions posed
photo courtesy fo colorUbold: https://spark.adobe.com/page/ZB9hWxdMyc9su/

Are you more masculine or feminine energy?
I am more masculine in the professional atmosphere.
in the intimate atmosphere, I am more of the wild wanderlust feminine.it took a long time to invite more of the feminine into my way of being after being suppressed while growing up.

freshly
photo courtesy of colorUbold: https://spark.adobe.com/page/ZB9hWxdMyc9su/

– How can you embrace the other side more?
I hope to embrace more of the feminine into my professional atmosphere….

and more of the masculine in my intimate relationships..

.as in penetrating the space with outward joy…

showing entusiasum unashamed.

not afraid to spill all the emotions-wild feminine
photo courtesy of colorUbold: https://spark.adobe.com/page/ZB9hWxdMyc9su/

I really really appreciate all Stefanos shared in the session.

I am also grateful to hear all he shared so authentically.

session 5:Play Hard Love Hard

Monogmy is Sexy and Obtainable
what an interesting interview!

Personaly for me having couple friends that display a great relationship is a motivating !!!

Sweet couple at the beach
stock photo from rawpixel.com
factor for monogamy…
answers to the questions posed by natalie:
#mirrorlove
Do you desire a monogamous relationship?

yes
I feel I am more expansive in so much loving one lover.
I feel it is a soul calling.
personally being with more than one lover I feel fragmented.perhaps that is just me.

Do you have good examples of healthy romantic relationships?
yes, I have a few couple friends older and younger who make the idea of relationships a peaceful sanctuary.

image-from-rawpixel-id-426307-jpeg
photo from rawpixel.com

in the interview, I love the conversation expressed and exchanged.
grateful for their presence and their outpouring of support.
they remind me of my couple friends.

session 3:Play Hard Love Hard

Natalie then interviews  Amber Kuileimailani Bonnici

(Creativity and Business Coach,)

https://www.theradiantmama.com/about-amber/

who originally invited me to this series”play hard love hard”

Amber is a creativity coach

and she does a great time of creating structure for creatives!

I love attending her online series

it always contains a wide variety of ways to relax and reflect while creating art.

question prompts after watching the interview and creating scribble art…

#creativityunleashed

Where are you creative in your life (not just artistic)?

I love to create links to people, link people to possibly collaborate together in my acquaintance circle. It begins as a heart spark I feel, I then ponder upon the thought I hope they are open to meet and interact with each other. Eventually, as the moment both people shows up in the same space, I introduce them to each other.I begin by sharing what I admire in each person. Then I just let the universe take over. I love to manage groups while I feel(intuitive hits) within me. I see and entertain the inner child in all who work around me. I have been told the same at goodbye parties.

 

A photo of my scribble drawingPSX_20190218_083253

and the message I received-

the intention I inquired:

in the professional outlet, I long to create innovation?

feeling confused….

like it is a cloud of an idea?!?

the answer received: I am warmly and deeply supported by

a team of characters/cartoon like animal spirit guides.

They are working through the heart intention. absorbing, learning and laughing ,throughout the journey.
=it has been synchronicities!
and still recieving……while turning the painting around and adding a little while relaxing.

from the interview :

-we start out creative

-later we think practical

eventually we become anxious,stressed ,depressed to disconnected from others and ourselves.

 the host thinks back to what inspired her for this series

…why are we disconnected? where is the love?(heart ache)

session 2:Play Hard Love Hard

Loving Your Body

interview with Holly Roesser

(http://www.loveyourbodyhc.com/)

Health and Body Image Coach with a specialty in body image

#lovebod

What do you see or feel about the way you look?

after a long time of sketching self-portraits, journaling, and spending time with people who support my gutsy work.

I judge myself less.
as a teen, as a young adult, I used to judge myself mainly skin color and curvy body shape in comparison to my slim  fair mother’s side of the family.

rather than embracing my curvy voluptuous warm toned body temple.

it took a long time to release these self-judgments.

photo: https://hautestock.co/

Do you place guilt or shame on food?

I place a lot of guilt in indulging in my favorite decadent desserts.

Atelier21 Co - Break Time-038
stock photo courtesy of https://www.atelier21co.com/

How can you shift to have a more healthy relationship with food and the way you look?

I believe that I can shift the way my relationship is to food by looking at food as part of nourishment and self-investment, rather than as a means to fill my hunger. Rather than diving into food as a comfort to stressful moments.

Atelire21 Co - Soft tea-017
stock photo courtesy of https://www.atelier21co.com/

I explored holly’s  5 day food challenge.

I really loved holly’s interview.
I can relate to some of her story. Especially when she shares about her rash and feeling less than.

session 1:Play Hard Love Hard

session one is an interview with a brain expert-

http://iamdrkaz.com/

questions after the session of a very lively interview.

This older lady is so young with her enthusiasm.

wow!

Atelier21 Co - Soft Hearts-5
stock photo from https://www.atelier21co.com/

What do you value?

I place the highest value on peace

and from living life,I deeply value trust!

Atelier21 Co - Soft Hearts-1
stock photo from https://www.atelier21co.com/

Measure your happiness on a scale 1-4?

I say 3

why not 4, I don’t know.

Atelier21 Co - Sweet Fem-004
stock photo from https://www.atelier21co.com/

What is your Brain Language?

kinesthetic/tactile learner

I gotta try out everything I learn with my hands

just love to touch and break everything on display…..

(hugger/lovers as DrK says)

Atelier21 Co - Sweet fem-001
stock photo from https://www.atelier21co.com/

 

 

 

 

 

Play Hard Love Hard series reflections.

I know I did not blog for a long time.my hands were serving a close one who had hand surgery.I again shall be serving this week onwards.so I thought I woudlpost a few deep written work of mine that I recently expressed.

valentines day is wonderful

stock photo from http://colorubold.blogspot.com/

it is a celebration of all forms of love

while celebrating love

I decided to dive into deep self reflection while looking at an invitation by Natalie Garnica for an online series”play hard love hard”

 

what is love?

and so I will share my reflections from the series along with the question prompts.

photo courtesy of http://colorubold.blogspot.com/

What is your definition of Love?

love to me is deep understanding,

an outflow,

what is created beyond this material earthly plane.

it is the source of what has created us….

and finally, as humans ,our life,

living daily is love that moves.

createherstock-vday
photo courtesy of https://createherstock.com/

Where do you find love in your life now?

my love, my creative outlet, my comrades (people with me), and my friends in my nonjudging warm spaces.

As I work in the service of life and death my heart cracks open daily!

it opens to emanate a nonjudging space..

this warm nonjudging space facilitates story sharing and healing within me and within others by themselves as they share their stories to me.

yes! as an eternal student I am still learning!

love-selfcare-createherstock-4
photo courtesy of https://createherstock.com/

Where do you want to create more love?
I want to create more love where love is stuck in my life.my challenges! I long to shine and be courageous. yet fear exists. I have love, yet hold on to it in a contracted state. i create yet it gets stuck and contracted out of fear.fear of being judged in the professional atmosphere…

create-her-stock-office-beauty2
photo courtesy of https://createherstock.com/

What heartbreaks are holding you back from creating that?
I have grieved from the death of close ones.., I have been brokenhearted in romantic relationships yet those did not weigh me down.I faced those feelings, forgiven and loved more after.

Yet the close one to one friendships

I have experienced(best friends).

Those friendships that are suddenly broken are exactly the ongoing heartache that I avoid to face the feelings.

though I exchanged the words of forgiveness…my heart still feels stunned…

can I trust again?…

can I trust myself to trust again in such close one to one freindships?

is there something wrong within me that allowed this to happen…

those deep friendships that are suddenly non friends..

and that….

yes that is exactly what is coming in the way of the above ?

stock photo from http://colorubold.blogspot.com/

 

watching a video of the hostess Natalie share her heartaches of  close best friend suddenly passing away at 19 and then again a close mentor best friend suddenly dying 2 years later

that vulnerablilty really touched me.

so strong is our desire to be loved and to be love

really touched me…so I am sharing  here this deep reflection that has emerged from the dark depths that I have perhaps hidden away and forgotten!love-selfcare-createherstock-6

If you would like to enjoy this deep dive in your heart and filling it up with thoughts,conversations and inner reflection….

http://love-rev.pages.ontraport.net/phlh1

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

2019 I will….sacred declarations

I really start my year in February…..ya i know the calendar changed to 2019 in january..

yet did it really feel like new years in january….

alll the new year resolutions…5 day challenges..and all the rushing….I don’t know..i did not feel it.

after groundhogs day….(Imbolc)after the wild cry of St Brigid saying”I won’t back down in what truly fires me up”….then I feel like I am just opening up to writing the date 2019 on paper..

until then I just tune in..go with the flow and observe the rising of creativity.

I weave in dreams for 2019 (from Jan to mid-Feb)

I collect written to does not accomplish…(professional career dreams, dreams of marriage, dreams of creating a nest of my own and the wild and crazy dreams that are within me from the challenges where I had a turnaround.)

dreams that seem to emerge within

 

the bunny doesn’t know it is spring,

unless there is more sunlight until winter.

I wonder if the ground hog will be right saying spring is coming early…he was running around looking for his shadow in PA(pensylvania)

i start my new year in february…lunar new year..chinese new year.

happy lunar new year everyone!wishes.jpg

after all the years of new years resolutions..rushing through the holidays and the burning out..

just makes sense to create a power pause…

and so here it is.

sacred declarations of 21 days…..oops there are only 12.hmmm

 

reblog:Changed! I hope it does more! Fashion Weeks’ Diet. —

It certainly changed! But….we are becoming more conscientious about the future of fashion & what direction to take! Are you willing to keep going with us on that journey? I hope so! Because Fashion Weeks’ Diet series just started & I want all of you by my side..oops..I mean…by the positive fashion side!

via Changed! I hope it does more! Fashion Weeks’ Diet. —

reblog:motivation thoughts — Thoughts of Sho

There will always be people out there who will try to hurt you and try to bring you down. They will do all they can to break you into pieces. But just like the sun still never fails to shine every morning although every night the darkness overpowers it, always be ready to give in […]

via motivation thoughts — Thoughts of Sho

reblog:Facts stranger than fiction..38 — Thoughts of Sho

Hawaii Hawaii, a U.S. state, is an isolated volcanic archipelago in the Central Pacific. Its islands are renowned for their rugged landscapes of cliffs, waterfalls, tropical foliage and beaches with gold, red, black and even green sands. Of the 6 main islands, Oahu has Hawaii’s biggest city and capital, Honolulu, home to crescent Waikiki Beach […]

via Facts stranger than fiction..38 — Thoughts of Sho

reblog:Appreciating Where I’ve Been — Artistcoveries

As part of my art-organizing and general house-cleaning, I’m still going through old paintings I’ve made in the last two years, many of which I’d all but forgotten about. Most of these are paintings I hated when I first finished them. The canvases are sitting around, awaiting their turn to be re-used and hopefully turned into […]

via Appreciating Where I’ve Been — Artistcoveries

reblog:Let’s Get Cooking Back in Schools — A Jeanne in the Kitchen

I have been cooking my whole life, and if I do say so myself, I am pretty darn good at it too. Not only do I know how to cook well, but I also know a lot about nutrition. When I was first in college, I was a biology major, studying to become a doctor, […]

via Let’s Get Cooking Back in Schools — A Jeanne in the Kitchen

reblog:Wait Until Summer — The 50 year old poet

I put my words down every day, hoping that they might show me the way to a place where my mind can rest, where everything is not another test. In my dreams I can see you standing there, waiting with arms out and a flower in your hair. Smiling, you tell me everything will […]

via Wait Until Summer — The 50 year old poet

reblog:In the Wild Streams — Ancient Skies

Will our children enjoy the depths of the wild streams when the end of all things is completed? Yes, as the ravens guard the river flow, and as wild geese fly over. Having been washed by the great trouble we can see now, when our tribulation will end. As cities descend into ruins, the Earth […]

via In the Wild Streams — Ancient Skies

day 5: healing the inner masculine wound last day….really the journey begins!

day 5 is a tapping exercise(https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tj_qSyfP2lQ)

tapping works for people!

I tried it!Depending on the topic it works at times.

nothing really for me yet regarding this topic of my inner masculine wound.

I will try it again,

and type in fruitful results as they happen.

 

we don't listen to ourselvesmost of us are not patient enough to listen to the language of the soul
stock photo courtesy of https://atelier21co.com/

Everyday I face the deep wounded masculine in me!

sometimes the voice screams out loud………….!

sometimes i am able to push it aside and sush it……………!

well,there are days I am unable to get past the voice to the inner wisdom…

being really honest I have my low days too…………..

the days I get over powered by the shadow and just dive into a box of dark chocolate truffles

 

_be willing to say no to something good that you want in order to say yes to what is really important and great

then I wake up!

and create something……………..thank goodness for art!

moveall that through the body,mind,heart…i wonder ….the emotions.move the emotions and create.

followed by a stroll in nature or a long jog in the hills.

after all that I feel at peace.

I hope you all had a great end cap of 2018

and opened a great door of possibility in 2019!

I am finally catching up to the blogs I left unfinished.

yes, I know so many entries are pending.

how have the re blogs been?…

my new years for me start on groundhog day…weaving in dreams for 2019!

until then planifest2019 strategy sessions…

https://members.epicdreamacademy.com/planifest-2019/?fbclid=IwAR2Cbs7n6h6uy8ikPDZiSXvtK_GAjNNzZO-6ZXjzWM5QTtyapupJlcPcF5A&cookieUUID=755a05cb-1ec9-4cfc-b910-1c082cb74ccc

here are some posts from my own photos I created during the series.

Has been a great series of interviews to listen to on rainy days. It will be playing for a few days more. I will incorporate the link in case there are some women entrepreneurs and dreamers who want to listen in while creating a 2019 plan.

 

 

 

day 4 self forgiveness to my deeply wounded inner masculine.

photo of person holding black pen
Photo by rawpixel.com on Pexels.com

I have explored how to

Set and communicate clear boundaries!

Voice my truth & and express my authentic self

finally stop being in control of everything and drop the inner critic….wow so much more space to be spontaneous!

Stop being busy doing,hustling, rushing & pushing through life…..wow deeper breaths to breath and more power pauses to just be.

 in this exploring I notice
where? when? and how?
I am not showing up for myself!
Iturn on the observer
perk my ears up
 and listen to when my own deep inner masculine  will arise…
often
just before starting a new collaboration,project,group trip…etc…
it shows up as a bully,telling me to “make a back up plan because the guys won’t show up and get the job done.. just do it all alone by yourself…”
most of the time it shows up and points a finger to the past
past mistakes of
-my dad not showing up for me
-my brothers not showing up for me
-my guyfriends flaking out on me
=how lonely and depressing….yet hey I learned things!
yet
it really is not all their fault
it is my fault!
I did not set the standard
I did not state what I consider my most important core value!

 I automatically assumed they would not show up on thier promise by secretly making a back up plan.

clouds-daylight-heaven-426983
photo courtesy of: https://www.pexels.com/photo/clouds-daylight-heaven-natural-426983/
It is also my fault to hold on to the bitterness….instead of letting it all go and forgive all concerned including myself!
 when I settle for less
relaxing the core  value,standard,,,etc.
yup!
another thing is
even now far in the future
when i meet and collaborate with men
I still hear that inner voice that says …
“he will not deliver what he promised”…”he is gonna be late”
and I  have  to hear the voice remind it
hey we are in the future
you are talking about the past
 we are safe..
so what if he doesn’t show up
i can deal with it..
just give it a chance
I know inner masculine you are just trying to keep me safe….
and you know what…
all the collaborations with men lately have been exceptional .
core values stated
appreciation stated
and the presentation becomes complete
it is now the women who are slacking off…
the masculine women…
hmmm…
still learning…

Why do I need to Heal my Inner Masculinein the first place????

So I can truely learn to set my standard!

so I can be commited to the standard for excellence..in all I contribute

To be unwavering, steady in stating it

hold the standard of your value, that energy how it looks, the experience you are creating not wavering no matter what
stock photo courtesy of: https://atelier21co.com/

as if there is this lovely little princess carrying a glass vessel awaiting for the partner to fill it up with magical waters…

how will the partner know how much to fill if the princess gets confused and keeps changing the size of the jar…

right?..

 

I hope to become the Sovereign Queen of your life you must heal both my masculine & feminine energies during careful reflection and reframing.

I discovered that I need to To dissolve my role in collective karmic wounding, cultural conditioning, limiting beliefs & unconscious resentments
and in turn To deepen connection & communication with the men in my life
listening to the recognise your mascuiline wound audio again
I reflect wow
so many times..
 so much to release
 and so much to re commit to
 what core values I have grown to
 and what core values have I outgrown
????
even in conversations
when am i getting reactionary thinking the inner critic wounded masculine dialogue
ears perked up
eyes wide open
deep breath
 be in the present..
 you have already been there..
dominent memories kept emerging through the later season of 2018
each time a lot of letting go,forgiveness,sefl forgiveness….
feeling the hurt
going deep
asking (just some journaling questions….)
why…why am I holding on to these masculine trait in my collaborations….
what do i miss out on?
for me
what i missed out on was
ease
flow
spontaneousity
creativity
peace
and exuding joy
yup!
now enjoy this prayer!

 

 

just for fun,Happy reblog weekend and a little something…

dear bloggers,

the last days of 2018 have arrived

Styled Stock Images for Instagram and Social Media
photo courtesy of http://www.scstockshop.com

some of you will be celebrating 2019 a little before me.

Free Styled Stock Photos from SC Stockshop_17
photo courtesy of http://www.scstockshop.com

I started this blog in a moment of sharing the deep thoughts that brew in my mind during the confusion of an arranged marriage proposal in August.Initially it was a space just to keep my inner reflections after journaling.

It was a good idea as a space.

beverage blur candy candy cane
Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

In that time, I also had interviewed a lot of married and unmarried people. I found blogging very helpful to help me really look at all the information gathered and experienced.

I am known to locally talk about taboo topics with my acquaintances and co-workers.I find it very easy to express my self in safe nonjudging warm spaces in groups. As a result of this experience, I often hold warm spaces of nonjudgement to the people I serve in my professional atmosphere.

It was a leap of faith to start blogging. To have my words be visible.

blogging was always on my to-do list…

as friends, acquaintances and my long list of people I text would reply after lines of reflections…do you have a blog?…you should make one!…the should? I was not convinced for a long time…

and it has been on the to list…

assorted hot air balloons photo during sunset
Photo by Snapwire on Pexels.com

well, it has been a few months…of blogging. I am so far behind of the topic of deep masculine wounds…hope to catch up.

autumn autumn colours autumn leaves beautiful
Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

Today I will be gutsy and share my paintings.you can check them out on Instagram/Reensarai.

 

Earlier in 2018,

I was interviewed on the topic of creativity as a healing outlet

as a supplement to medicine.

I shared about the creativity tools used by practicing doctors in releasing anxiety for themselves as well as for supporting patients.

I love to relax in nature and take landscape photos, nature photos to relax.when I am not I browse through travel magazines.

Do you use stock photos in your blogs? I do! Few times I use my own.

Feel free to explore mine…

I invite you to use them on your blogs, just please make sure to mention the link in captions

https://www.pexels.com/@reen-s-470280 and https://unsplash.com/@reensarai.

After deep analytical work, as well as deep studies in medicine,

unwinding with art,nature, and writing out my thoughts, help me express those deep thoughts to eventually peace..perhaps even release and heal… I often wonder.

Untitled design(8)
photo courtesy by sheboldstock.com

 

thank you  dear blogger Jay for the nomination for the Liebster award.

I hope to type that blog post in the new year.

Untitled design(9)
photo courtesy of sheboldstock.com

so much learned in 2018!

a lot of leaping out of comfort zones for sure!

happy last days of 2018.

blur bokeh bright burnt
Photo by john paul tyrone fernandez on Pexels.com

 

The Awesome Impact Award,thank you and happy reblog friday.

A big thank you to Manuela

jestoni-dadis-973365-unsplash
photo courtesy of unsplash(https://unsplash.com/photos/-Tbf_04i5rA?utm_source=unsplash&utm_medium=referral&utm_content=creditCopyText)

for nominating me for the Awesome Impact Award.

the-awesome-impact-award1

Please visit her beautiful blog https://inaloveworld.wordpress.com

a blog about inpsirations,poetry and the all love can bring.

where you can find photos, daily thoughts, life stories.

The rules of this AWARD are:

  • Tag the person who nominated you;
  • Take “The Awesome Impact Award” Picture and add that in your post;
  • Talk about an incident that impacted your life in a really positive way;
  • Nominate other awesome bloggers for this award.

 

The positive incident which impacted my life:

so many…I will share one.

When I was 12 I had the chance to see a presidents library(Richard Nixon or Ronald Reagan I am not sure now).

I was wandering , looking at the displays, talking to other children my age with delight and wonder. Though I had gone with my younger siblings and my parents I took the time to appreciate each displayed item.usually as a pre-teen was always policing or babysitting my younger siblings. I often felt that my thoughts, my ideas are overshadowed by my parents or my siblings. So I love to take the opportunity at an outing to be really engrossed in displays at museums. To be really within me, my thinking space and the surrounding. To really wonder and reflect.At that age, I was interested to form my own opinion. While wandering in interacting with my peers I had this feeling of joy in my heart. Nearby there was a lady that was holding a microphone and taking the time to interview youth and hear their views on this library, president.
I walked around with joy and a smile. This beautiful woman noticed me and approached me.i was surprised, “I get to speak my thoughts and share them, wow”I took the time to breathe in .be calm and share what is within. I spoke as if the president was there listening. I expressed gratitude that this library is free and he has shared his life in the form of these displays so that us young people can look, wonder and reflect.
after that, my voice along with many children was shared over the radio. I never heard the broadcast. Something changed within me. I am here to be joy and share the love. That memory still fills my heart with warmth and my voice with laughter. The impact after has been that I have the ability to share my words with joy. I think that the first incident really just showed the light that exists in all of us, yet we overlook it.

 

My nominees:

1)https://harbansinnerthoughts.com/

2(Invest in yourself )https://mylifeexperiences648467241.com/home/

3)https://phoebemd.com/

4)https://mteodoraa.wordpress.com/

5)https://ashalvesblog.wordpress.com/

6)https://stories870.wordpress.com/

7)https://ericalagan.net/

8)https://takeituponyourself.wordpress.com/

9)https://intentforcontent.com/

10)https://onelife513532705.wordpress.com/

11)https://makeitultrapsychology.wordpress.com/

Congratulations to all bloggers!

tyler-nix-685422-unsplash
photo courtesy of (https://unsplash.com/photos/dqoUlaU5aRc)

My thanks to the whole blogging family for being part of my life.

 

 

 

sunshine blogger award nominees(2)

Here are the questions answered posed by Goretie,

do check out her blog!

(https://httpgoretie.wordpress.com)/

:

1) Why do you love blogging?

I love blogging because it gives me space to put my thoughts with a nonjudging crowd.

something like a sanctuary.

It feels like space I can show up and be me.

For years I have journaled out my feelings and written down inspirations.

and passed inspirations on pieces of paper to all I meet.

Blogging takes that to a shared space, to anyone, anywhere.

I would like to blog everyday yet I blog as I get time.

“Through Creativity we can channel our universal human experiences” – Kiala Givehand

2)Do you find peace and happiness when you share things that bother you on your blog?

I feel a release when I blog.

I feel happy to put thoughts, wisdom from journeys(inner journeys) out there.

I feel happy when I find that I am not alone, others have experienced the same feelings/situations too.

3)How do you feel when your post inspires others more than you expected?

When people are inspired by anything I create…I feel inspired to create more. I feel this gives me a little hope while facing challenging days at work.Yes there are dark days…dark gloomy days even for me…

4)Do you love nature? Why?

I love nature. It recharges me. I feel great peace observing and walking in nature. Creatures are so interesting. It reminds me there is a bigger world out there than just my human challenges. I am a human that possesses the wildness of nature…yet I forget living in civilization.My dream is to flow as nature. Nature heals. It is the origin of our existence.

5)What is your view about Africa?

I am open to visit Africa someday. I wonder about Africa.All I have read will never convey the uniqueness of the country and its beautiful people. I have met many wonderful people who have lived in Africa….and so I am open to visiting someday.

6)If you were SANTA, who would you pay your first visit and presented your Christmas gift to at exactly 00:00hrs on the 25th December 2018?

I would visit my sickest pediatric patient who I visit on volunteer weekends. The first  I see on my free time or holidays is usually the sickest or the poorest before any family or friends. I would love to give this child a surprise.

7)Do you find joy in giving or receiving and why?

I find joy in giving. I feel joy in receiving appreciation. Giving allows me to share the experience.I expire breath of joy,to share that joy is giving…no matter what form.

8)How would you react if a stranger walked to you in tears and requested for a tight hug?

I would look at their eyes and really see who they are. I don’t just hug anyone unless I feel safe. I am an empath. I absorb so much that is not mine as it is. hoping I feel safe, then I would hug them tight and share a few warm words if they are open to hearing it. I would mostly just listen to what they wish to tell and witness them.

9)What is your favorite color and why?

my favorite color is fuschia purple. It is bright warm and light. I have good memories of fushcia throughout my life. It is not pink it is not violet it is right in the middle…both.

10)How are your post related to your daily life?

perhaps, when I am well rested my posts are the deep thoughts that have been processed and finally the light that emerged from that contemplation. I am here to spread warm light. In person or while blogging the same intention.

11)Which one is your favorite between winter or summer and why?

I am a tropical woman. I love summer. I love being in hot climates. I love being out and playing. Winter seems to be dark. less sunlight where I live.continuous rain and typhoon in other places.being indoors,perhaps in the cold I feel I am conserving my energy in all I do to keep warm. I have been told I am my best in the summer wherever I live.being indoors for long periods of time gets me sad. I am a warm people person.

 

yellow sunflower with leaves
Photo by Susanne Jutzeler on Pexels.com

The Sunshine Blogger Award is an award for bloggers who are creative, positive, and inspiring – people who spread “sunshine” to the blogging world!

I nominate 11 bloggers who I feel add sunshine to many for sure…as well as myself.

Thank you nominees for blogging.you inspire me!

1)randolphharris3508.wordpress.com

2)researchsearchonline.wordpress.com

3)theaddiaryhome.wordpress.com

4)https://inspirechange27.wordpress.com/

5)katespage23.wordpress.com

6)parkhenet.wordpress.com

7)libahome.wordpress.com 

8)forbeingalive.wordpress.com

9)https://inaloveworld.wordpress.com

10)https://anamikaisblogging.wordpress.com/

11)https://witheverygoodwish.uk/

yellow flower illustration
Photo by Susanne Jutzeler on Pexels.com

the rules of the sunshine blogger award

  • Thank the person who nominated you and provide a link back to their blog so others can find them.
  • Answer the 11 questions asked by the blogger who nominated you.
  • Nominate 11 other bloggers and ask them 11 new questions.
  • Notify the nominees about it by commenting on one of their blog posts.
  • List the rules and display the Sunshine Blogger Award logo on your post and / or your blog site

Questions posed for all 11 of you….

1)what inspired you to blog? how long have you been blogging?

2)how have you grown/changed after blogging?

3)what advice would you give to someone who is contemplating to blog, yet has limited time off? or limited skills?

4)what are your dreams or wishes to complete for the last quarter of 2018?

5)what motivates you?

6)what keeps you consistent to blog as often as you do?

7)if you had to go to a deserted island, what piece of technology would you take with you that you cannot live without?

8)if you had won the lottery of 1 billion dollars, how would you spend it? or what would you do that you have been putting off?

9)if you found out that you have only a year left to live what would you do with the remaining time you have?

10) what would you tell your 12-year-old self? advice?

11)where do you wish to take your blogging to…a book…a course…a youtube channel…just a blog?

congratulations to everyone!

silhouette photography of woman
Photo by Pete Johnson on Pexels.com

 

 

Sunshine Blogger award(2) Happy re blog friday

Hi everyone,

background beam beautiful close up
Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

Happy friday!Happy re blog friday.Maybe i reblogged many more this week as my left wrist is feeling much better since thanksgiving holiday

I got nominated again for sunshine blogger award!

Thank you,

httpgoretie(goretie)

heart shaped red neon signage
Photo by Designecologist on Pexels.com
She blogs since 4 months,
she has a positive message,colorful explorations and an expressive mind.
I started blogging 4 months ago too.
Between reblogging posts of followers on fridays… I always spent a little extra moments to read her blog and absorb the colors of her pictures.
(I appreciate while reblogging.i look at picture,I look at words and at times when i feel warm I comment as well.I think many of you know that!)
She has a lot to say and big dreams to create a book.i believe she shall in time.For anyone that needs a spring in their footstep I invite you to check it out.For the curious you can learn more about her on her recent sunshine award post.i posed some questions to all i had nominated last week.

painting and drawing tools set
Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com
please check out her blog: https://httpgoretie.wordpress.com
Thank you Goretie!

pink petaled flowers
Photo by Asad Nazir on Pexels.com

 

 

 

 

 

sunshine blogger nominees anouncement!…. and reblog friday

 

Hi everyone

action adult adventure beautiful
Photo by Daniel Frank on Pexels.com

I wanted to share with you the lucky 11

I have nominated for the sunshine blogger award.

Congratulations to all bloggers!

yellow flower illustration
Photo by Susanne Jutzeler on Pexels.com

here they are,

  1. https://httpgoretie.wordpress.com/

https://artistcoveries.wordpress.com/(Judith) generous request to

2.

3. https://thevoiceofpeace.blog/

4. https://nayakravindra.wordpress.com/ (Ravindra Nayak)

5. https://ptmasterguide.com/ (priyeshbanerjeept)

6. https://sophrosyne960024464.wordpress.com/( Sophrosyne )

7. https://mavieswaythroughlife.wordpress.com/ (mavieswaythroughlife)

8. indianeskitchen(Diane)

9. https://jennifertarheelreader.com/ (Jennifer ~ Tar Heel Reader)

10. https://sagittariusdolly.wordpress.com/

11. https://belleofdblvd.com/ (Jenny)

personally, congratulate them…

even follow them,

they are pretty awesome!

woman standing on stage
Photo by Genaro Servín on Pexels.com

now for the 11 questions they will have to answer:

1)what inspired you to blog? how long have you been blogging?

2)how have you grown/changed after blogging?

3)what advice would you give to someone who is contemplating to blog, yet has limited time off? or limited skills?

4)what are your dreams or wishes to complete for the last quarter of 2018?

5)what motivates you?

6)what keeps you consistent to blog as often as you do?

7)if you had to go to a deserted island, what piece of technology would you take with you that you cannot live without?

8)if you had won the lottery of 1 billion dollars, how would you spend it? or what would you do that you have been putting off?

9)if you found out that you have only a year left to live what would you do with the remaining time you have?

10) what would you tell your 12-year-old self? advice?

11)where do you wish to take your blogging to…a book…a course…a youtube channel…just a blog?

turned on pendant lamp
Photo by Burak K on Pexels.com

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

nominated for sunshine blogger award

almost 10 days ago I have been nominated for the sunshine blogger award.

thankful for a few days off to reboot and catch up to blog this

A big thank you to Yonnie

for nominating me for the Sunshine Blogger AwardFeatured Image -- 2279

Please visit her beautiful blog : https://yonnieinhiscare.blog/

a blog where you can find hope,encouragement,faith to inspire your day.

she posts great pictures too.

I love the questions you asked and will do my best to answer. Before that, let me explain the rules for the future nominees :

  • Thank the person who nominated you and provide a link back to their blog so others can find them.
  • Answer the 11 questions asked by the blogger who nominated you.
  • Nominate 11 other bloggers and ask them 11 new questions.
  • Notify the nominees about it by commenting on one of their blog posts.
  • List the rules and display the Sunshine Blogger Award logo on your post and / or your blog site.

    close up of tree against sky
    Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

Here are the questions answered:

1.How much time do you spend blogging?

  • I spend maybe two sessions of 40 minutes blogging a week.
  • I carry a journal with me throughout the day and write as a long time habit.
  • I  start my day with zen pages/morning pages/brain dump followed by a few minutes of free flow writing.
  • I write or sketch when I get a chance on  my breaks throughout the day.
  • Most of what I blog has been from journals that I have written while processing my deep feelings from events that have happened in my life, reflections from them along with inner self development exploration.
  • I have a habit of reading at least one self help book a week,one motivational book a week and keep a creative podcast/inspirational interview series in my email inbox.
  • This helps me tune into inspirations while i transition from work(medical research/teaching/studying) to home.
  • There was a time I would say if it were not for this, I would not be clear minded.
  • I am still a work in progesss.
  • Thank you for reading…along.

2. How did you tell your friends and family that you were a Blogger?

I have not really told my family, maybe I mentioned to the out of spite a few times after the arranged marriage proposal situation(August 2018) .Especially when parents mention their regret(roaring laughter).

All my friends know that I have started blogging.

Often I share conversations about journaled refections/inspirations with friends, acquaintances on a daily basis. Over the past three years my friends had been telling me”Reen, I am sure these inspirations you share with us can be blogged and perhaps add to peoples lives who need it the most“.I have been blogging since August(4 months).
3. Which is your favorite dish to make?

I love to make slow cooking desserts on the stove(fruit puddings). I love to grind the warm spices with brown sugar and smell the melting sugar on the stove as the pudding cooks. Anything made from fruits into a pudding…fills the air with so much love.
4. What would be your dream vacation?

my dream vacation would be a treehouse getaway in the St.kitts, Santa Lucia or St.barts.

Barefoot running through white sands,

coconut sweets filling the humid atmosphere,

cocktails with a tiny umbrella floating,

swaying palm trees in the breeze,

the smell of tropical flowers,

tan bodies dancing to calypso music,

and endless smiles from arrival to departure.

Did you also enjoy imagining it with me???!
5. What genre of movies do you like best?

I love mysterious movies with a happy ending.I love watching cartoon movies.
6. Do you awake out of your sleep to write? sometimes Why?

some theories:

the Earths heartbeat(Schumann resonances) between 2 and 3 am our brains are at this peak of Dreamtime.

Some yogis claim this is the time of restorative sleep.

Some spiritual traditions share of a dream time guardian spirit that blesses each of us with our highest calling related to music,art and story we are here to create.

which only we can create.

I notice that these spiritual guides can be our loved ones who have passed on or even totem animal guides.

In case I miss this moment to get out of the dream and write/sketch that piece of unique I regret.

When I find creations I feel all the earlier sentences may be true…
7. Are you a morning person?

  • I am.
  • I have been trained to be one from school, undergraduate and medical school.
  • I prefer to sleep when sleep and rise when I feel well rested.
  • On a holiday I am an afternoon person.
  • Occasionally during the winter, I can be a night owl.

8. Do you enjoy motivating others

YES! I enjoy encouraging, inspiring and sharing laughter with all I meet.

I love to motivate people as I motivate myself.
9. How do you think your friends see you?

My friends see me as a light a warm safe light here on earth to share, warm up and witness all who enter my space.

My friends have told me my voice can calm them down, my laughter fills their heart and they always remember to check that I am ok.
10. What would be your idea for saving the environment from pollution?

reusing as much as we can that is manmade.

Returning back to nature all that is of nature.

To learn and share to heal the earth and all its creatures.

Find out what the original earth ancestors did they give back to the earth? perhaps we can find a way to welcome that.

(for example as a physician my dream, is to bring back the old ways of plants incorperated into healing which has been lost after the pharmaceauticals started making pills…yet I am still learning)

 11 other bloggers nominated for this award

  1. https://httpgoretie.wordpress.com/

https://artistcoveries.wordpress.com/(Judith) generous request to

2.

3. https://thevoiceofpeace.blog/

4. https://nayakravindra.wordpress.com/ (Ravindra Nayak)

5. https://ptmasterguide.com/ (priyeshbanerjeept)

6. https://sophrosyne960024464.wordpress.com/( Sophrosyne )

7. https://mavieswaythroughlife.wordpress.com/ (mavieswaythroughlife)

8. indianeskitchen(Diane)

9. https://jennifertarheelreader.com/ (Jennifer ~ Tar Heel Reader)

10. https://sagittariusdolly.wordpress.com/

11. https://belleofdblvd.com/ (Jenny)

Congratulations to all bloggers!

yellow sunflower with leaves
Photo by Susanne Jutzeler on Pexels.com

Dear nominated bloggers here are your 11 questions…I will be playing along with you and answering them as you answer them…take your time.

1)what inspired you to blog? how long have you been blogging?

2)how have you grown/changed after blogging?

3)what advice would you give to someone who is contemplating to blog, yet has limited time off? or limited skills?

4)what are your dreams or wishes to complete for the last quarter of 2018?

5)what motivates you?

6)what keeps you consistent to blog as often as you do?

7)if you had to go to a deserted island, what piece of technology would you take with you that you cannot live without?

8)if you had won the lottery of 1 billion dollars, how would you spend it? or what would you do that you have been putting off?

9)if you found out that you have only a year left to live what would you do with the remaining time you have?

10) what would you tell your 12-year-old self? advice?

11)where do you wish to take your blogging to…a book…a course…a youtube channel…just a blog?

 

 

the deep masculine wounds I picked up as a teenager…

day 3 on the series is an audio

The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the rest is merely tenacity. The fears are paper tigers. You can do anything you decide to do. You can act to change and control your lif
photo previously on pexels.

….bringing the inquiry.

where did I pick up this wound?

in my teenage hood  in my young adulthood

where was there a man would do not allow me to feel safe?

…where I was not taken seriously?

all the time by my own father.occassionalyfrom toxic people in my work plac.rarely from authority figures in my new job

where I felt I needed to do it myself? that I cannot trust a man to provide safety for me?many times I saw this modeled to me from my own mom.when promises are not carried through she had a back up plan.i picked up the habit to keep safe for a long time. now is the time to be accepting of the past and let it all go…

love everything the way it was not the way you wished it would be... we start to recognize perfection in the way things were so that we can live life in more joy
photo courtesy of atelier21co.com

remembering the strength I carry,not the struggles or the wound.

this certificate is awarded to

one of the many phrases I say when appreciate the great guys around me

now that women are sharing their stories,I feel courage to dive into my own

and

eventually share mine

bit by bit.

not so much to tell the victim story

more of

all of you reading

may find tools that help you heal

or help you preserve the wonderful next generation to come from experiencing the deep masculine wound

or imbalence

 

just sharing a quote i heard recently that I love:

“I see now what I am putting into ,to investing, society is still catching up with you, you have to grow into it before society catches up”..norma hollis

kaboompics_Christmas gifts for a cute little dog
find stock photo here https://kaboompics.com/photo/9685/christmas-gifts-for-a-cute-little-dog

 

Grateful to recieve your comments, likes and encouragement.

in this season of recieveing and giving…

taking some time to thank each of you!

before the friday re blogging begins…

may you feel love for all the great moments you contibute just be being you…Blue Sunflower Thanksgiving Poster

one of my favorite lines shared by jenn bradshaw:

Deep inside me a fire grows inside, A fire that represents my love and appreciation for this year, The good, the bad, the in-between and those things yet to be told.

What washes over me are all the emotions I’ve shared, The tears, laughter, excitement, doubt and even the unseen These emotions continue to flow leading me to greater things for 2019.

Listen to the trees + the wind that whistles though the leaves, It shares with us the wisdom of the past and roots our dreams, Even as the winter has it turn cold, to ice or even snow – spring will bring all the right opportunities we need to unfold.

happy thanksgiving

enjoy chasing the black friday deals

 

Healing my inner Masculine: recognizing my masculine wound,why, it even exists?

We really want to know our guys to know how we as women feel…yet what I going on on the other side, what are shifts they are going through?“Jonita D’souza

so true we as women want men to know how we feel, yet what are they feeling?…

especially in relationships!

three women walking at shore
Photo by rawpixel.com on Pexels.com

reason for the interview for this “heal your inner masculine “lifestyle class!

for more info on Oliver Huntley-http://www.awakeningmasculine.com

sharing the emotions and memories that emerge within as I witness this  conversation:

what ways can positive masculine heal women heal their inner masculine?

pine trees under starry night sky
Photo by James Wheeler on Pexels.com

experiences from his life as a coach, Oliver Huntley shares:

when a negative experience of the masculine comes into a woman’s life a wound is created!

women will revolt against the masculine!

so women in the feminine pull away from the masculine.

so a woman can become safe again

hence identifies the masculine as a threat(consciously or subconsciously)
she starts to feel unloved, unseen, unheard and undesired…

or the opposite the women go too far into the masculine

to become too controlling too strong too domineering
pull away from the masculine

or go too far in the masculine so they don’t get hurt

when healing rewiring, reweaving enters she can suddenly heal these wounds

with good experiences,”this is what it is like when am in the positive masculine”
when a man is in celebration for who she is.

so unresolved issues become resolved.

showing up as a positive expression”

woman wearing black sleeveless top and distressed blue denim jeans outfit while sitting on chair
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the host shares her personal story of how she created a dominant masculine qualities

to be safe!

 

things to do and think about-(how to rebalance this in her relationship with her partner. in business and in the releationship…finding the internal balance)

-(making sure the expression of each is in a positive expression of the feminine and the masculine)

-(how to balance within ourselves and then create space for the partner to feel safe to truly express themselves.)

 

it is an individual job!

how to balance within and create a safe space for the partner to figure it out too…man or woman

 

the host As  a teenager, she was being a tomboy in India, to be safe(I can relate too)

 

yes! I think I go through this…I also accept that I must journey to heal and let go of this!

 

so what shift does he(Oliver Huntly) see in men?

men are developing in 3 main areas!

relationship with the heart!

developing a relationship with themselves

getting solid and sovereign in themselves and then in a relationship

cultivate a relationship with self

“you can only love someone as deeply you love yourself”

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as men received “shoulds” from society too!!!!!!!!!!!

We have a wonderful choice for creating a beautiful container in relationships

the value in loving the partner and the container of a relationships

the relationship of 2 people is a living being too…(a living  coexistence!)

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how can men show up and manage conflict in relationships?

it is when there is a true test in a relationship

what is going on inside is shown!

so now men are not as shut down now they able to learn how to remain open.loving and present …to hold space for the partner…

the need of the era

a certain level of trust is born when a man can stay centered and stand in her energy.

when men are able to stand in that peaceful energy

another question in women-how to communicate with a man about their desires in a way that doesn’t offend him?…..

the kind of approach he suggests…..

awareness of what each partner needs to feel loved and supported…

it is a conversation we do not have enough

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lack of honest communication

important for women to get clear with communication with a partner of what you need in the relationship.

coming from a place of love and support…

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fatherhood conception pre conception cleansing…..-an opportunity we all have!

very common for both men and women to have a fatherhood wound…

how can we all cleanse and heal this? as we (men and women)don’t have a lot of guides.

openness, vulnerability, sensitivity feels very lost to man!

the prime influence of the masculine is usually from the father we (men and women)receive the template of the masculine

ancient rites of preconception cleansing-another opportunity we can bring back

so we are not taught… for a long time…

we get to take responsibility

anything negative it stops with me!

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we get to filter out and purify to offer out a fully clear energy..

no longer pass down anything negative to the future children

seems like a lot of thoughts shared by leader Oliver Huntly.
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I invite you to carry home what resonated with you…as i shall carry what I feel can help me heal the inner masculine within me and what exists in my relationships…

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Healing my inner Masculine-identifying my dominant masculine traits

Identifying my predominant energy on a daily basis

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while taking time to be present and go through the list of masculine and feminine qualities

I mark masculine traits and circle the feminine traits.

I tally them up to find:15 feminine traits and 15 masculine

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then I take a deeper look, now when I am at work how is the tally? I work most days…

16 masculine and 13 feminine. and yes readers I am a lady with more masculine qualities(laughter!)

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wow!

the traits I feel are dominant daily?

-I often follow culture rather then the flow of nature to feel safe!=I am open to follow nature and go with the flow!

-I have a tendency to be in the state of thinking,logic,mental energies that in turn provide structure that creates order(health care provider education)—>which allow me to feel safe and in control!

-I am open to feeling,intuition,being open to my emotions,being in flow while nesting in choas.=the last part I am learning!

-I am always striving for perfection to be safe,rather then allowing imperfection(where learning and innovation happen)I am open to accepting imperfection to allow space for innovation

-I am often focused on the non changing task .(ultimately becoming robotic,stubborn)

-I am open to learning to become multi tasking and ever changing(innovative with more breaks,more space=more energy)

-I follow predicted circumstances and can be all in the head,I am open to being in the body(embodied) and open to unpredictability=>adaptable to change.

-I often feel disconnected,while striving,impatient pushing things to happen constantly busy doing!.

-Through anxiety,burnout and past failures I have been forced to change. I accepted the lesson and learned to be patient,tranquil allowing for change in a calm.

my assumptions of masculine and feminine until now:

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Photo by picjumbo.com on Pexels.com

The way to be successful in work is to be masculine and push down the feminine.(past thought)I thought I had to supress,hide and push down all my feminine qualities to be liked at work.

which is true…for a while…and then the time had arrived when I felt cold, anxious and fake.I was not happy! I had to reconnect within to who am I really.Then I found oh this is who I am  and happiness entered the moments i made space to be creative.

really, I am a warm ,people person,I hold people,I witness their emotions and I provide a safe nonjudging space to really listen to people,help people to get to the root of the issue.

which list resonates with me?

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I feel really warm looking at the list of feminine qualities.It feels like play.It feels expansive,full of wonder and open to innovation.It feels like the change i seek and see in teh future.

what are my judgements to the list that feels unfamiliar?

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my judgment to the list is..

well the masculine list is productive yet not aligned to me anymore.

Ideally, I would love to flow between both lists and

adjust to being productive and innovative!

I will have to find a way to grow to have an even score….hmmm.

my personal experience of living in the masculine

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what have I gained?

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what have I lost?

the masculine energies really helped me in school,in college,in medical school..

unfortunately though it showed me I am self sufficient  and intelligent, It gave me the idea that I don’t need people.The false haibt of i can do things on my own!

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Yet,later after graduation in clinical clerkships,subinternships and medical networking interviews….there is a need to be collaborative,fluid!

I was too rigid and i bombed it being cold,anxious and stiff.

Ultimately the high stress of being so disciplined for long I ended up with health issues.My body begged for a break.Eventually I burnt out and had to adopt a complete lifestyle change !

I am thankful for it.To make space and discover how to be feminine and how to be in the body and feeling instead of all in the thinking mind.

the one thing I am called to do differently right away after this excercise???

find a new way of being

and heal my inner masculine qualities.

so i can shift between feminine and masculine qualities like a flow

I am sure there is something that needs to heal.

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It will really help me show up in collaborations integrated vs over anxious or too airy fairy.hmmmm

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starting a self study course called”Heal Your Inner Masculine”

Finally found my new home! 

I wished to start the inner masculine deep wound exploration because:

  • to improve and  communicate clear boundaries

  • Voice my truth & authentic expression

  • Stop being a control freak & overtly critical 

  • Stop being busy, rushing & pushing through life

    photo of woman standing near classic car
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    Why do I need to Heal my Inner Masculine????

     

  • To become the Sovereign Queen of my life I must heal both my masculine & feminine energies

  •  

  • To dissolve my collective karmic wounding, cultural conditioning, limiting beliefs & unconscious resentments

  •  

  • To deepen connection & communication with the men in my life

    lake
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what I discovered from doing the course is :

1)Woah I picked up a lot more masculine qualities from going to professional school.

2)I have been faulty and wounded in masculine qualities when leading men in my life let me down.

3)I, myself am not receptive to receiving as a result of being so masculine

4)this is the cause of my burnout after medical school,in my female colleagues and possibly all health care providers in the US.( maybe…my theory)

5)Since I am so masculine I attract men with more feminine qualities.

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6)The nicest part is the men I attracted have helped me learn and master creative expression.I in turn had the opportunity to help them be organised,practical and disciplined.

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I am thankful to take this course(http://jonitadsouza.com/lc2/) now so I can grow to evolve and heal.

I hope to re balance masculine and feminine qualities within me.

May all my collaborations from now on be fruitful and flowing.

 

 

Exploring Feminine essence: Celebration

I can’t believe it has already been 7 weeks!Untitled design

reviewing each quality by answering a few reflecting questions!

Exploring choice:

how are you feeling about the choices you are making in everyday routine?

I am feeling more aware of my feeling and enjoying them as a direction to when to move and when to pause and reflect.

I notice I am more responsible to myself.

I feel empowered to make the right choices and to say no to the choices that don’t feel right.

are you becoming aware of taking responsibility for them?’

I am aware that not being present or honest to myself is robbing myself of my authentic life.

what changes did you notice in your “being”?

Even when a crisis or chaos arrives, I am able to navigate forward to the best possible choice

 

exploring commitment

adult medium coated white dog standing on grass field beside a cherry blossom tree
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you made few commitments!

yes, I did!

what resistance did you feel while following throughout?

excuses, shadow self.victim mode past memories of things that did not work out.perhaps the same thoughts that circulate in my subconscious.

what awareness did it bring to you about you and your being?

I am aware that I am the hardest on myself…and I am the only one that can motivate myself by changing the response to the shadow thoughts.

exploring consistency

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what is your feeding the feminine first routine?

waking up in the morning,

looking up and closing my eyes,

to say

great mother of the earth

what shall we (me and my inner child) do today to:

fill up,

be love and share?

After being directed to what feelings of pain I need to attend to,

I go off to drink some hot lime water with honey and write 3 pages of stream of consciousness(brain dump) followed by a few affirmations that may be true for me followed by inspired thoughts.

and I start my day!

 

when I reach workspace, I take deep breaths in and remember

what I felt, heard within, imagined in meditation(intuition)…

of what I can do to fill up,

be love and share, this day?

I lay my stuff down and take a quick stroll to see flowers or art that is in my environment. I breathe the joy of another day in.

 

are you following it through sincerely?

mostly the first part. I change the routine as the weather changes.

how is your being?

more peaceful, more inspired, less stubborn and less heavy.

feeling empowered?

yes

through everything, you are complete!

while you are feeding the feminine first routine

 

exploring connection

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picture courtesy of pexels (https://www.pexels.com/photo/assorted-color-string-lights-752484/)

were you able to enhance the connection with your being?

yes more in touch with my feelings

taking time to honor my feelings

taking space to release anger
what did you discover about yourself in this exploration?

exploring compassion

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how are you handling self-judgment?

it comes up at the moment I ask so what has been going on and

what else may be true?

have I heard this from someone else?

past the exploration, what difference did you feel,
feeling lighter
after the forgiveness prayer?
feeling much better

 

exploring creativity

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what self-loving reminders of art did you create?

here are some as seen on instagram.com/reensarai/

_People spend the day sun worshipping and the evenings dancing._Copy of I treatmy bodyas asacred templeUntitled design
what new ways of being are you bringing into you?

pastel colors

jewel tones I usually don’t wear

and more nature within my routine

writing down new ideas as they emerge
recreate personal essence?

adding pale pinks to my wardrobes.

open to other suggestions
and living environment?

sacred space for praying being at peace containing

-candles of seasonal flavors apple and blueberry pancakes

-a herb box of scents(lavender, peppermint, rosemary, basil, dried orange peels, rose petals and mint) that calm me down

-a shot glass of essential oils

After decluttering making changes week by week to add something calming in

-working on editing my paintings after work so I added a table for my artwork creating in my room. As I transition from work to home I edit past paintings/creations.just 15 minutes brings me joy to the change I wish to create in the world.Previously I would create on the floor or my writing desk/shelf.

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Exploring celebration:the celebration you really are!

after reflecting

time to move on to the celebrating!Untitled design(1)

 

 

time to summarize the healing and write two letters to two lucky people!

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because I also like to surprise the people that I love.

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…the people who help you to be you

your physical body is the perfect thing you require at this stage of your life…

ugly feet

scared to wear open toe shoes…

the power of ppls words

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what have I stopped because of giving away power to other ppls words?
conditioning, programming, false beliefs from words from elders?

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an expectation for someone,
trace back before 12 years old.

Is there something deep in the past?
tune in within!

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and ask?

Thank you 100 followers!

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it has been 2 months of blogging

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it all started with an arranged marriage proposal  and the confusion of how my boundaries were over stepped

and I was thinking i think it is time to blog,not just journal while doing some personal development.

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yet

it feels so interesting this experience of blogging

i appreciate all the comments,

all the open minds,

all the thoughts that are helping in my own growth

i also have enjoyed getting to know all of you,

reading your blogs and celebrating you all…

so unique

great writers

and colorful lives.

man and woman walks beside green sea
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every friday i try to reblogg the posts i loved reading…

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review of Compassion,what I learned

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How am I feeling about being self critical or self judgemental after the compassion exploring?

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I feel more aware to interrupt the self critic as it comes up….because i learned it is the past talking or i have not learned that to be truth if I had not experienced that assumption from action yet.I also observe this critical,judgemental thought as a floating cloud,unattached.I observe it and ask and where have I heard that before?is there a new way to discover this topic?

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 how am i feel ing after being compassionate with myself?...

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I find I am more able to be compassionate to others and be patient after taking tiem to be compassionate to